This is the first blog post I’ve written that makes me incredibly emotional simply because of the topic.
For those who don’t know me, I am the definition of a type-A perfectionist. I thrive on organization and making to-do lists. I love having a busy schedule and planning tons of projects. I’m always trying to improve my skills to be better than I was yesterday. Improvement, for me, can also mean that I’m looking to other bloggers as an inspiration to become better as well.
In hindsight, this doesn’t sound like a horrible thing, right?
Remember in elementary school when your teacher said you had to “peel back the onion” to see all the different layers? This behavior can be dangerous even if it doesn’t seem that way on the surface. Once you peel back the layers of the onion, you see more of the dangers of comparison.
What I didn’t realize is how much comparison consumed my life. Growing up as an athlete, comparison and striving to improve was essential to succeed among tough competition. Unfortunately, most of the time, this lead to unhealthy behaviors with working out too much or not eating enough. But, it goes to show that comparison has been part of my life for many years.
Then college came around, and comparison was in full force. Now, post college, I realize that comparison didn’t rule my life as much as I was expecting until I noticed my unhealthy obsession with comparing myself to other bloggers.
Most people don’t know this, but I have been blogging for awhile. I see some bloggers are making thousands of dollars after launching a website in under six months. Whereas I’ve been working on this for years and haven’t quite found my way yet.
There are fashion bloggers who have beautiful, outfits, a full face of Instagram-worthy makeup and Pinterest-perfect hair. There are beauty bloggers who can create unique makeup looks, and show their skills easily on their blog. There are lifestyle bloggers who passionately share their stories that so many people can relate to.
I didn’t feel like I could measure up to all the talented bloggers I know.
I didn’t feel good enough.
Every post I put up, I hated. I didn’t like anything I was creating because comparison got in the way of my judgement. It made me feel horrible about myself.
That’s when I knew I had to stop.
Whether you’re comparing yourself to the model on Instagram, or to the blogger you have looked up to for five years—you cannot compare yourself to that person. Of course, this is easier said than done. There will still be days where I’m going to doubt myself and fall back into the comparison trap because it’s an easy trap to fall for.
But I will not allow it to control my thoughts about myself and my self worth. One of my goals was to be more kind to myself, and this is one aspect I know will help me reach that goal.
If you’re out there comparing yourself to anyone whether it’s a friend, a model, a blogger, or someone you don’t even know…please stop. You are most likely doing more harm than good. It’s okay to learn and improve, but it’s not okay to judge yourself negatively. You deserve to be kind to yourself.
I hope this has helped someone, or has inspired someone to begin a new chapter in their life free of comparison.
Have you ever struggled with comparison? Make sure to leave a comment below!